Water leak at our house finally resolved

Well, well, well ....... who'd've thought it?

Water Company expert no. 3 turned up today as we haemorrhaged water while, at the same time, not using any. The first thing he checked was ........ if our meter was, in fact, connected to the supply pipe for our house. Ha, ha, ha!

No, it was not.

Was our meter registering the consumption of our ecologically aware neighbours. Or the neighbours with a swimming pool .... WITH A LEAK ?!

Yes, we have paid our water bill in advance for the next 62 years but we intend to get it back.